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Log Activation; YC 111.10.04


"Touch is the most demystifying of all senses, different from sight which is the most magical."

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Atfal paced the room, his mind a mess of thoughts and contradictions. He played over the shopping outing that he had earlier in the day with Lt Shalee. Nearing the end of the trip he had asked of her the favor he knew he shouldn't have.

He voiced his thoughts as he sometimes does when working through problems, he found it helped him solidify things and get a grasp on them.
 
"Have I placed too much risk on her, given all that she has been through with the brass" he let the question hang in the air....
 
Walking over to the bar he poured himself a drink, then paced toward a small white seat in the room. The soft clicking noise that he made to sound out where things were in a room echoed slightly off the cavernous interior of the room. Outside a storm was raging snow and sleet beating against the think panels of the observation decking. It matched his mood today, seems his home planet knew him better than he knew himself.
 
His mind slipped back over the events of his life prior to joining PIE as he sipped at the red sweetly spiced wine. Kari V had been all he had known until he stepped into a pod for the first time. He remembered growing up as a small child, and wading out into the snow capped landscape on still days. The fresh powder crunching under his feet. On those days he imagined he could see, right to the other side of the planet from the observation deck. He was, he thought to himself, happy.
 
But that life was gone, a distant memory scarred by the fact that his family were not who they appeared. The fact that he wasn't even the son of either of them grated even more on his soul. They murdered his real family and kidnaped him as a child, brought him up as a tool for their own gain.
 
Atfal lifted the glass up and inhaled a deep breath though his nose. The sweetness of fermented fruit, the hint of spice. Nutmeg and cinnamon he thought to himself before taking a sip. The taste was sweet and lingered in the mouth, full in body and rich. This is the world he lived in now, a life sensed and imagined.
 
Lowering his glass he spoke allowed to himself, "I expected better news from Doctro Halgren regarding my sight. Normal implants will not be enough to restore it...typical, always the way. But of all the groups of scum why is a Sansha implant the only one that will work. I thought I was rid of that lot once and for all when I excommunicated my family on the day of their capture".
 
'Sins of the Father' he thought to himself, but it is why he went and spoke to Shalee about it. He still felt uneasy about it now hours after talking to her in the shop. He felt cheap really, the gifts he bought her were to cheer her up and now she must think he was just buttering her up to get what he wanted. Another in a long line of people trying to use her. It wasn't the case and he hoped she saw through it all.
 
Atfal stood and strolled over to the observation window, placing his had on it's surface. He could feel the vibrations through the panels as the wind, sleet, snow and rain buffeted against it trying to force it's way inside. Futile he thought to himself, again a lot like myself in this venture.
 
"Is it going to be futile?" he voiced the thought
 
"I joined PIE supposedly secure in who I was, now I am not so sure. I feel like the foundations I have built upon are nothing more than a snowflake, carried away by the slightest breeze." he sighed.
 
He skipped through events that had unfolded recently, events that made him question who and what he was becoming. The discharging of swatty, the reprimand of Shalee for standing up for PIE's ethos. It stank of nepotism and archaic ways, an organisation locked into rank and structure and unable to see the truth woven between the lies and deceit.
 
His mind flicked this way and that, scarcely staying on one thought process before focusing on another problem at hand.
 
Finally he made up his mind, "What is done is done, hopefully Shalee can put me in contact with someone who can help me in obtaining an implant. That is where her part should end I think, it is no use getting her further into trouble given the effort she goes to now days to stay out of it".
 
He paced back to the bar pouring the wine down his throat in one gulp "Once I restore my sight then I'll look at my situation in PIE. Perhaps I will see things more clearly, perhaps not, but that is a question for later".
 
His mind wandered once more, wondering what she looked like in the dress she tried on earlier. It had cost a pretty isk that was for sure.